May 2023 - Growing Up in Santa Cruz

Editor’s Note

growingupsc — Fri, 05 May 2023 01:51:24 +0000

One of my main reasons for buying this magazine four years ago was to help me be a better parent. With all of the experts writing for us and all the input from families across the county, I figured I could get answers to all the questions I had about raising my now 7-year-old son. It turns out, however, I have far more questions than answers. I guess, like all families, I feel like I’m guessing about what to do and hoping I get it right. I’ve got challenges and questions and would love some feedback from you readers. Consider it a homework assignment and think about how much you can help other parents struggling to find answers. And please show your work. In other words, give us examples of what you’ve seen that shaped your opinions. How do you know whether your child should skip a grade or stay back? Private or public school? What’s been your best experience with each? What do you like or dislike about charter schools? Is the newer trend of having kids with special needs in mainstream classrooms a benefit or a problem? Is college still relevant and necessary? What do you do with your kids during the summer? If you send them to camp, how do you decide which one? Does your school have enough extracurricular activities, like band, art, music, sports, drama? Speaking of sports: do we put too much emphasis on it in school and could the money be better spent on more academic or cultural activities? Is the isolation from the covid pandemic still affecting students? Are teachers too easy or too hard on students? How much homework is enough—and should students even have homework?Should students be required to be bilingual? We spend so much money on the education system, yet teachers are so underpaid, many are leaving. What are we doing wrong? That’s just a start. I’ve got a million of them. If one or more of them stirs a passion, please send us a letter to editor@growingupsc.com and we will print them. Santa Cruz County School Superintendent Faris Sabbah will answer your questions in a new column starting next school year. Brad Kava,Editor and Publisher

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Pet Guide

growingupsc — Fri, 05 May 2023 01:50:00 +0000

Looking for the perfect place to pamper your pet? We’ve got you covered. Center for Animal Protection and Education (CAPE)Santa Cruz, CA & Grass Valley831.336.4695info@capeanimals.orgwww.capeanimals.orgThe Center for Animal Protection and Education works to save the lives of individual animals who are older or have special needs and to educate people about ways in which they can change their own lives to alleviate animal suffering. Our concept of compassion extends to all beings. Compassion without Borders1130 Butler Ave, Santa Rosa707.474.3345cwob.orginfo@cwob.orgCompassion Without Borders was founded in 2001 by Christi and Moncho Camblor with the vision to provide a brighter future to animals in need on both sides of the border. CWOB works a multifaceted approach to reach animals in need via our four programs; Mexico Dog Rescue, US Dog Rescue, Veterinary Wellness Clinics & Spay/Neuter Services. We also actively participate with other rescue groups in the US and Mexico to provide outreach for humane rescue education & training via seminars. Corralitos Riding Club1079 Green Valley Rd. Watsonville831.461.4181max@corralitosridingclub.comCorralitosridingclub.comTake Pony Riding Lessons on our two white ponies, Pegasus and Marshmallow. We teach lessons, host pony parties, and have 2 sessions of Horse Day Camp coming up June 26-30 and July 17-21. We can accommodate all skill levels including first-timers. Come ride with us. Da Vinci Equestrian831.359.2853davinciequestrian.com/Da Vinci Equestrian offers a horseback riding lesson program and full service horse training, with facilities in Watsonville and La Selva Beach. Da Vinci Equestrian emphasizes the relationship between horse and rider, horse care, and offers individualized programs to fit the student’s needs. Specialization in Hunter/Jumper and 3-Day Eventing. Monthly lesson packages and week-long summer camps available. Ages 5 and up welcome! Please view our website for more information. Doggie Protective Services, DPS RescueDpsrescue.orgDoggie Protective Services, better known as DPS Rescue, was founded in 2001, as a nonprofit organization that rescues dogs and cats of all ages, sizes, and breeds from throughout the state of California. We do not have a shelter facility and all of our dogs live in foster homes from intake through adoption. We specialize in rescuing those that may be at risk of euthanasia, including pregnant and nursing mama dogs, medical cases, and the shy and shut down pups who do not thrive in the shelter environment. We don’t just rescue dogs! We also have a team that rescues cats and kittens, including bottle babies and nursing mama cats, and cares for them until they are old enough to be adopted. Muttville255 Alabama St, San Francisco415.272.4172info@muttville.orgMuttville.orgWe reach out to senior dogs at risk, give them the care they need, and find them loving forever homes. If we had our way, no dog would spend their last days in a shelter. There is so much love and joy in these dogs! Muttville’s cage-free facility (first in the nation), foster program, on-site veterinary suite, and hospice program are innovations that have been lauded and emulated around the country. Pacific & Santa Cruz Veterinary Specialists – 24/7 Emergency2585 Soquel Drive, Santa Cruz831.475.5400Pacificsantacruzvet.comFrom trauma treatment to cancer care and surgery, an experienced team of board-certified specialists and Santa Cruz emergency vets offer advanced medical care for pets in need. New patients are always welcome. Peace of Mind Dog RescueMain Office: POMDR Patricia J. http://www.PeaceOfMindDogRescue.orgBauer Center, 615 Forest Avenue, Pacific GroveVeterinary Clinic: POMDR Harry and Jaynne Boand Clinic, 1251 10th St, Monterey831.718.9122Info@PeaceOfMindDogRescue.orgwww.PeaceOfMindDogRescue.orgPeace of Mind Dog Rescue is a resource and advocate for senior dogs and senior people on California’s Central Coast. We find loving foster and forever homes for dogs and provide financial assistance so senior people can keep their pets as long as possible. Head to our website to adopt, donate, foster and volunteer! Santa Cruz Animal ShelterSanta Cruz Shelter1001 Rodriguez St., Santa CruzWatsonville Shelter580 Airport Blvd., WatsonvilleMain Line: 831.454.7200Licensing: 831.454.7261Animal Control: 831.454.7227After-Hours Emergency: 831.471.1182scanimalshelter.orgThe Santa Cruz County Animal Shelter is responsible for enforcing the laws and codes involving animals within the County of Santa Cruz, City of Santa Cruz, City of Scotts Valley, City of Watsonville, and City of Capitola. When calling to report an incident, please have as much information as possible including description of animal and owner, address of owner, and/or license plate of owner. The Santa Cruz County Animal Shelter is an open admission shelter which welcomes EVERY animal in need every day, 365 days a year. Dedicated staff and volunteers provide care for every animal who comes in. Animal living areas are kept clean, warm and comfortable. Frightened animals are reassured, and sick or injured animals receive medical treatment or a humane end to their suffering. Santa Cruz SPCA2601 Chanticleer Avenue, Santa Cruz831.465.5000adoptions@spcasc.orgwww.spcasc.orgLooking for a four-legged BFF? You’re in luck! The Santa Cruz SPCA has a pawsome selection of cats and dogs just waiting to steal your heart. Our devoted staff and volunteers have showered each with love, belly rubs, and playtime galore. Swing by and fetch your new furry friend today! Your Furry Godmotheryfg@comcast.net831.818.4032Seeking Loving Quality care for your Furry Family Members? Your Furry Godmother has been Granting Pet Care Wishes to Santa Cruz County families for over 20 years. Whether it’s Doggie Day Care, House-sitting, Boarding, Cat Care, Administering Meds (pills, Injections, SubQ Fluids), Pet Uber to Groomer/Vet Appointments or transport to other parts of the world that you need, I am here to make your pet care wishes come true. I am just a phone call away. Vet recommended.

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How Are You Going to Celebrate Mom?

growingupsc — Fri, 05 May 2023 01:45:19 +0000

Turning Nightmares into Bliss

growingupsc — Fri, 05 May 2023 01:38:08 +0000

This morning, Jaime McFaden’s 6-year-old daughter Sofia came into her room in tears after having a nightmare. Her dream – that her mom was taken onto a pirate ship and killed by pirates. “I think the greatest legacy that I can leave my daughter is that every moment of every day is a gift,” said Jaime, 37, who lives in Capitola. This is a conclusion that Jaime came to after her father died of alcoholism when she was just 18 years old.The death of her father caused a mindset shift in Jaime, after watching him be seemingly unable to control the decisions that made him sick in the first place. Jaime knew she did not want that to be her life and thus began her wellness journey that would ultimately change the trajectory of her life forever.Single mother and wellness guru, McFaden has had a life that was anything but normal – but she took her experiences and turned them into motivation to help herself and now she uses what she knows to inspire others through self-care and giving fitness classes for moms in Santa Cruz. Born in Redwood City to a large and proud Greek family, Jaime had a happy childhood. That is, until her blissful childhood years became plagued with nightmares and visions. From ages 8 to 12, Jaime struggled with severe depression, anxiety, and insomnia, with her visions getting so intense that she was studied at the Stanford Medical Center and even featured on the TV show Dr. Phil.All of these struggles culminated in her hospitalization at age 12, which Jaime describes as “a life changing experience that made me realize I wanted help and support, I just had no idea how to do it.” Breaking her own cycles, Jaime transformed her life for the better; she even went on to win Miss Junior California at 15 (which Jaime describes as very uncharacteristic for her). All of this came crashing down when Jaime’s father fell ill and ultimately passed away. Feeling herself slip into her old habits, Jaime then dedicated herself to understanding mental health, behavioral patterns, and the best ways to take care of yourself. Starting with physical fitness, Jaime threw herself into challenges, worked with a handful of trainers, and ultimately started gaining clients of her own. During this time, personal training was a side business for Jaime. Graduating high school a year early, she lived in Greece for one year which inspired her lifelong passion for traveling, even going on to become a flight attendant with Virgin Airlines. As a blossoming fitness guru, one of Jaime’s biggest role models was renowned fitness and life coach Jillian Michaels. When Jaime found out that Michaels would be speaking at an event she would be attending, she did everything within her power to figure out how she could meet the woman who helped change her life.She called and emailed Michaels’ office with no luck and even found herself approaching Michaels’ security during the event to see if they would let her get a glimpse of long-time role model.Her persistence paid off. Jaime was granted permission to go backstage and meet Michaels.After only a few minutes of conversation, Michaels asked Jaime to join her on stage for her workout event. “She put me on stage and there were like a thousand people in this room and I did this workout that I had no idea I would be doing. It was so wonderful and scary and challenging and all the things,” said Jaime. From there, she was invited to audition to work with Michaels. Today, the two still have a relationship, having worked together for over 10 years. Working with Michaels opened a whole bunch of doors for Jaime. She began working for other fitness platforms such as Aaptiv and Grokker – she was even featured on Good Morning America, doing a segment on the different types of injury-free exercise. Jaime eventually began working exclusively for Aaptiv, which gave her freedom to travel or work from home which was a great benefit for her now that she had her infant daughter. Life was perfect.Then, just before Christmas in December 2020, her whole team got laid off. With no job and no other business ties, Jaime decided it was time to “do this on my own.”Jaime created her own brand, W.A.V.E. by J, which works to teach others, specifically moms, how to practice self-care and take back control of their own lives to create a happy and healthy existence.She also runs a podcast called Self-Care Secrets where she provides “a full toolbelt of action steps you can take daily to put yourself at the top of your priority list, having more to give to the world.” She also wrote a book titled “WAVES of Self Care” of which her mentor Jillian Michaels wrote the forward.Now, Jaime spreads her message her way. Having a podcast, a book, 13,500 Instagram followers, and content across several fitness platforms, Jaime spends her days working with clients, practicing her own self care, and spending lots of quality time with her daughter Sofia. When asked her favorite part of her journey, Jaime instantly knew it was motherhood.Part of her overall goal is to give Sofia an example of a positive role model who approaches life with confidence and kindness. “If I can show her that mommy can be healthy and work hard and be empowered and be kind and loving and show up every day for myself as well as for her, I hope that can instill in her a confidence that she is not only worth living a happy, healthy life, but that it’s totally possible.” Like many others, Jaime used to think self-care was selfish or a luxury. But that is exactly the misconception she hopes to break with her work. For her, the ultimate self-care is taking responsibility for your own life first so you have room to care for others – and that’s exactly what she preaches throughout her work. “Sometimes self-care is actually getting work done. Sometimes self-care is shutting off my phone. Sometimes self-care is literally doing nothing besides playing with my daughter because playtime is a huge part of self-care that adults forget” Jaime said. The biggest theme throughout both Jaime’s work and her own life is that everyone has the ability to take responsibility for their life and if you’re not happy with where you are, you have the ability to make a change for the better and you are not alone in this. See her online fitness videos and learn more: jaimemcfaden.com. Writer Gabrielle Gillette is a Cabrillo College journalism student who wants to pursue a career as a reporter and will attend U.C. Berkeley next year.

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Santa Cruz Riders Make Debut on National Stage

growingupsc — Fri, 05 May 2023 01:31:29 +0000

The horse-riding women of Santa Cruz’s White Rock Interscholastic Equestrian Association were shocked and ecstatic when they won a slot to compete in the biggest national riding competition in the country by one point. The team, which practices at the Monte Vista Christian’s equestrian facility in Watsonville, won the slot for a trip to North Carolina at a tightly contested regional competition in Paso Robles.Five of the team’s 11 women—all about 16—gathered enough points of the season to move onto the biggest competition. Three of the most seasoned equestrians: Paris Mahoney, Cavan Smith, and Meagan Mejia have honed their skills with IEA since middle school; while the other two riders Lea Bianco and Elyssa Marcucci are new to the program but by no means new to the sport. “These girls live and breathe horses, spending most of the day at the barn, riding and caring for the horses,” said Coach Tesi Pickett. “They work hard and are very deserving of this chance to showcase their skills.” Mahoney and Smith will compete as varsity open riders jumping a two and a half foot fence height, while Mejia will represent for varsity intermediate, Bianco in JV novice, and Marcucci in JV beginner.For many of the girls on the team, the sport is more than just something they go to after school, but a chance to be a part of something bigger and grow as a team. Mahoney says the most important metric for their success is to “Definitely keep a level head. That’s what matters most is coming out and being indifferent, not letting the stress get to you.”The young women practice riding six days every week and spend countless hours caring for and maintaining their horses. For years, White Rock IEA practiced at White Rock Ranch, hence the name, owned by Mahoney’s family. This marks the first year that the team practices at Monte Vista Christian School’s equestrian facility, and practices with their 34 horses: including two of their most beloved Donny and Pete. “In practice we’ll ride one then swap so we have the opportunity to ride different horses,” said Smith.From April 28-May 1, they will travel to Tryon International Equestrian Center in North Carolina to face off against the best teams in the country in the Hunt Seat IEA National Finals. “I think it will be pretty tough, this is our first time going. I’m very excited and we have put a lot of work into this,” said Smith about heading into the biggest competition in the history of the team. White Rock IEA has already beaten insurmountable odds just by qualifying to the most competitive equestrian event in the country. They compete in zone 10 region 2, and the first step for making it to nationals is to score a total of 21 points against regional teams including those from local ranches. From there the opposition only became more advanced in regionals, but White Rock played to their strengths and was one of only three teams to travel to Paso Robles for the zone 10 finals – which encompasses all of California, Hawaii, and part of Nevada. From there, only the single best team advances to the National Finals. It was in a moment of ecstatic disbelief when the women heard the announcer crown them victorious by just one point. Every hour spent waking up at 5:30 am to prepare the horses for competition, or weekends together watching in awe at professionals pull off impossible stunts they one day dreamed of maneuvering; it all materialized along with the realization that – while they would give everything they’ve got come competition day – each of them earned the biggest stage in the nation through half a lifetime of dedication. By Quinn Southall

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Drawing Guns in the Classroom?

growingupsc — Fri, 05 May 2023 01:23:08 +0000

What began as a simple weigh-in from Bay Area parents on whether kids should be allowed to draw guns with historical figures in schools, exploded into much larger topics on what is deemed inappropriate, policy consistency, societal dysfunction and personal expression in and outside of the classroom. There is no blanket law in the state of California on what is and what is not allowed to be drawn in schools, rather, it’s up to the discretion of the individual teacher. This is just a preliminary discussion on this topic, let’s keep it going… CONSISTENCY IN THE CLASSROOM“School districts are not given standards on what age can be drawing guns; there’s no written policy of things you are not allowed to draw,” said Chief of Communications and Community Engagement for the Santa Cruz City Schools, Sam Rollins. “It’s up to the discretion of the teacher if they find something disturbing or violent.” San Jose mom, Megan Thiele Strong wants no guns, in pictures or for play. “It seems like there has to be a boundary somewhere, and I fully support a boundary being no pictures of guns allowed. As we all know, as we all so deeply know, guns do not belong in schools.” Gina Grajewski, a Santa Cruz parent, agrees that no guns should be drawn in the classroom under any circumstance. “It’s my understanding that this is just a rule. No guns at school. No drawings. Period. No gun play. Period. No guns. Period,” said Grajewski, a PVUSD parent. In the case of a teacher discovering something that a student has created disturbing, said teacher would make the time to speak to the student regarding their relationship to firearms, then the teacher would seek a conversation with the parents, according to Rollins. “This is to make sure there’s nothing dangerous going on in the student’s life,” said Rollins. “This would be a really extreme case to trigger conversations, however.” One Santa Cruz parent, Kathy Vega, also takes the position of no gun pictures in schools. “I agree with the rules of not drawing guns or weapons at school,” she said. “If anything, we should try to educate our children not to touch guns in hopes that they will make that decision if they happen to be in a situation where they have access to one.” “An open and informative dialogue including gun safety would be more productive rather than blanket banning or making the topic a taboo,” said Sandra Orozco, a Santa Cruz parent. “Children are curious and/or exposed to weapons of different diets, monitoring their drawings I doubt will have the intended impact. I think they should have the opportunity to talk about guns in a safe, age-appropriate way.”Agreeing with discussion first, another Santa Cruz mom, Robin McClenahan, looks at gun safety as an opportunity. “Demonizing topics for kids is never a solution in my opinion,” she said. Also weighing in on this, is Elizabeth Marzili, a Bay Area mom. She said, “I think drawing historically accurate pictures should be allowed. Give it the correct context instead of a hard NO is my preference.” Rollins, Santa Cruz City Schools Chief Officer of Communications and Community Engagement, suggests that if a parent feels like their child was wrongly accused of inappropriate firearm (or anything else for that matter) drawing, they should reach out to the school. “We want the teacher to understand what’s going on, especially if they’ve inadvertently made a student feel uncomfortable.” CALIFORNIA HISTORY & STANDARDS“The standards serve as the basis for statewide assessments, curriculum frameworks, and instructional materials, but methods of instructional delivery remain the responsibility of local educators,” states the History Social Science Content Standards for California Public Schools released by the State Board of Education from May 2000. With public elementary academia beginning to teach about colonization, settlement and wars in fourth grade, it’s a wonder that there isn’t a more uniform position on the topic of drawing a picture of firearms in the classroom. “My son was gently reprimanded for pretending to shoot a completely imaginary bow in the classroom, due to weapons being banned,” said one Santa Cruz mom, Jenny Bellik. “It seems to me that if it’s appropriate to be learning about battles or wars where guns (or other weapons) were used, it would be appropriate in that context for kids to process that by doing drawings that include those elements.” “Fifty-seven percent of TV programs contained violence; perpetrators of violent acts go unpunished 73 percent of the time; about 25 percent of violent acts involve handguns; 40 percent of all violence included humor; 47 percent of violent situations present no harm to the victims and 58 percent depict no pain; and only four percent of violent programs show nonviolent alternatives to solve programs,” Kris Lene, a Santa Cruz parent, pointed out. “These are some results from a study done in the 90’s, and violence in the media has only gotten worse since.” Lene goes on to explain that the average preschooler who might watch about two hours of cartoons per day, is exposed to 10,000 violent incidents within one year. “Our primal brains can’t differentiate between real life and what we see on the screen, which is why we cry when a character dies on a show, or feel nervous during a suspenseful scene,” said Lene. “Guns and America were born around the same time and grew up together,” wrote Linton Weeks in an NPR article from April 2013 called “The First Guns in America.” “Like feuding cousins, their histories have been linked ever since.” Another Santa Cruz mom, Kelly Gavin, added that “almost five million kids live in a home with at least one gun that is loaded and not locked away. Over half of the kids in these homes know about that gun, unbeknownst to the parents.” Gavin goes on to agree with a few of the other local parents in saying that this event presents a great opportunity to speak with children about firearms. “Guns are deeply ingrained in American society because of the second amendment,” she said. “Guns are politically divisive, and thoughts vary so much depending on where you live, how you were raised and who you vote for.” THE LARGER LENS ON SOCIETYAccording to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) in a 2020 statistic, over 19,000 deaths from 2020 in the United States were homicides – yes, you read that right – which represents a 34 percent increase from 2019, and a 75 percent increase over the course of the previous decade. “The data also shows nearly 53 people are killed each day by a firearm in the US,” writes the CDC. “Provisional data for the following year suggests nearly 49,000 gun-related deaths occurred in 2021.” There hasn’t been an official report released from 2021 as of the publication date of this article. “I think what really needs to be examined is the prevalence and normalization of weapons and violence presented to children in our society,” said Sage Lampros, a local Santa Cruz mom. “Sure, it’s good to not have them bringing that imagery into the classroom, but that doesn’t protect their imaginations from society’s training that weapons are a normal, cool, and powerful aspect of masculinity.” Another Santa Cruz mom weighed in, “I am horrified at the book bans happening in other parts of the country. Trans people exist, LGBTQ people and families exist. Racism exists. Guns exist,” said Sara Wysuph. “Trying to ban things that make people uncomfortable is heartbreaking to me. We have to allow radical acceptance and discussion amongst ourselves and our children.” A BLAST FROM THE PAST“I’m glad I grew up in a time when it was ok to have fun and pretend,” said Bay Area mom, Tina Schofield. “My neighbor saw us kids pretending to play cops and robbers with stick guns and made us some really nice wood ones from his shop in his garage. Yet none of us kids grew up to shoot anyone ever.” “I grew up with guns in Scotts Valley. Every truck had a rifle rack in it, foyers had long arms at the front door. There were no mass shootings or accidents,” said Rhonda Reyna, a Scotts Valley parent. “I can’t say I would trust just anyone now to be that bold, but firearms are what deter tyranny.” According to California’s Penal Code 12556 PC, a first offense at displaying an imitation firearm is fineable up to $100, the second offense is fineable up to $300, and then the third or any subsequent offenses would garner misdemeanor charges in addition to a maximum penalty of $1000 in fines with six months in county jail. A Wall Street Journal article written June of 2011, describes toy weaponry – specifically guns – as having “come a long way since those leaky water pistols that shot barely more than a dribble and always seemed to need refilling,” wrote Ann Zimmerman. “In 1989, Lonnie Johnson, an aerospace engineer from Atlanta, Ga., took a model of a heat pump that used water instead of Freon, hooked it up to his bathroom sink and, using air-pressure technology, began shooting water across the bathroom into the bathtub.” WHAT IS CREATIVE EXPRESSION?A creative person is described as having “the ability to invent and develop original ideas, especially in the arts,” per Collins Dictionary. A creative expressive person might demonstrate “ideas or feelings [while] showing of them through words, actions, or artistic activities.” Could we put art, even in its more rigid form of historical depiction, into a category of creative expression? “I find it odd that a kid’s drawing of a gun is a would-be sign the kid is dangerous. Shaming a kid for drawing the picture he wants to draw is a bad thing,” said Janice Barkwell, a Santa Cruz parent. “Some kids draw things like that so they can express themselves and process their trauma. I’m not a fan of censoring a child’s art.” Scotts Valley mom, Christa Dae McGuire, had an experience where her son was reprimanded for drawing zombies. “Vine Hill Elementary sent my then-first grader (last year) to the principal’s office for drawing zombies in a cemetery and said it was inappropriate.” Another mom, Beth Catesi of Aptos, said that her son and PVUSD student, wasn’t allowed to draw the holster of a gun. “My son, three years ago, drew a Fortnite character for homework.,” she said. “He wasn’t allowed to even draw the holster without a gun.” “My kiddo was drawing guns, knives, swords in first grade with blood,” said Santa Cruz mom, Megan Jean Kilmer. “Our family isn’t into weapons, but he is exposed to Minecraft and Zelda. [His] teacher was ok with it but asked us to talk about it with him. And it is not okay for him to draw dead people or killing or use fake gun play at school.” Sarah Nielsen, a Santa Cruz parent, believes that there should be a designated space for children to express themselves. “Maybe if elementary schools had an actual art class, kids would have the time and space to find their own creative voices in a safe environment where they don’t get punished for exploring some of the darker things that they are exposed to,” she said. “In my opinion, kids should be allowed to draw what they like to express themselves,” said San Jose mom, Julia Primavera. “Art is a healthy outlet and there is absolutely nothing wrong with kids drawing weapons of any kind or drawing anything for that matter as long as it isn’t made to mock another child and isn’t racist or anything like that.” “I’m just lost as a parent with kids age ranges from three to 17. I’ve seen so many changes in the public-school curriculum and behavior,” said Santa Cruz mom, Hillary Guzman. “What happens to the child that’s told to draw pictures of their summer vacation, and they got to go hunting with their family? Should they feel ashamed or scared to put that?” LOCAL...

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Where Do Babies Come From?

Laura Maxson — Fri, 05 May 2023 01:12:02 +0000

By Laura Maxson The stone goddess pictured here is open mouthed, likely emitting a full throated roar as she opens herself to give birth. This is the face of birth. It is uncommon now to see such instinctive and primal behavior. This archetypical birth goddess has at once been humbled and empowered. Her face, transformed by labor’s intensity, becomes the face of all birthing people. Features soften as they revert to a more primitive existence – based simply on survival. Breath by breath, and contraction by contraction, she goes so deep within her body’s power that she becomes one with it. Giving birth with all the power of the universe and at the same time acutely aware that she is alone in the task. Homebirth midwives and care providers who work with those planning natural or physiologic births see this transformation regularly. Research shows that in cultures that assume labor will be hard, experience less pain. They know they will get through it just as their ancestors did. Is it any wonder then, that in our culture where birth is thought of as a surgical procedure, necessitating anesthesia and technology, that most of those in labor get an epidural and one in three give birth by cesarean section? There was a time when babies grew and developed during pregnancy with nothing more than time and nourishment. They came out through labor produced with the power of the body’s own hormones. We have forgotten that pregnancy and birth are body driven, not doctor driven. Ultrasounds don’t grow babies; epidurals don’t make them come out. Technology can be essential for specific problems and high-risk pregnancies; however, when served a steady diet of high-tech medical care that documents normal pregnancy progression but neglects the emotional preparation for a life-changing event, expectations change. It used to be that babies all came from that place of the stone goddess – from the body’s toil, sweat, and tears of labor. Nature intends that babies come from deep inside the body’s very core. Labor allows that core to be reached by slowly stripping away outer layers one by one, until after the fear, pain, and exhaustion comes a powerful truth – that bodies are strong. That surrendering to labor brings not defeat, but the victorious roar of that final push that brings both the baby and the powerful transition to motherhood and parenthood. Childbirth produces a progression of physiological changes that aren’t always valued. The body’s own hormones act upon the pregnant body and baby to optimize birth, love, bonding and lactation. But, it’s not hard to disrupt the hormones and the physiology of labor and birth. It can be as simple as beeping machines, clacking computers at bedside, opening the door of the labor room, flipping the lights on, and asking again, “how is your pain now?” As labor is disrupted, technology is often applied. Replacing normal birth hormones with synthetic hormones may not be as straightforward as we think. Synthetic oxytocin (Pitocin) by IV reduces oxytocin levels in the laboring brain, opiates reduce the body’s own natural endorphins, and epidural medication reduces hormones that help prepare the baby and mother for birth. The stone birth goddess pictured here may look a little scary, but there is no denying her power. Most everything in the current medical model of care for birth is designed to minimize this power. It takes hard work in our culture to come to birth prepared to actively claim their authority for a powerful birth.Childbirth classes are disappearing as parents more and more relinquish the responsibility for learning about and preparing for childbirth. The eight to 12 week long childbirth class series that were once the norm have been replaced by just one or two short classes. When a pregnant person feels fear and panic in anticipation of labor, and is surrounded by those who devalue the experience of childbirth, it is easy to relinquish the opportunity to go to that deep place that forever remodels the structure and strength of a parent. In order to change the expectations of labor and birth in our culture, it is our responsibility to convey the image of the stone goddess and all she represents as one that nurtures an anticipation of power. Find midwives, childbirth classes and more – birthnet.org

The post Where Do Babies Come From? first appeared on Growing Up in Santa Cruz.

Self-Care Is Essential

growingupsc — Fri, 05 May 2023 00:54:51 +0000

This year will be the first time in 23 years that I won’t spend Mother’s Day with at least one child in my home. My youngest child is away at college, and my oldest is traveling with a friend (With what money? I don’t know, but that’s a topic for another article.). It’s bittersweet. When my kids were younger and I was an exhausted parent, the only thing I wanted for Mother’s Day was the chance to sleep in and have a break from parenting duties for the day. Now that they’re older and more independent, I would cherish the chance to be woken up by their smiling faces and spend the day with them. But I’m reminded of how overwhelmed and exhausted I felt (still feel sometimes) as a parent juggling family, work, and life – and how important self-care is to prevent burnout and create physical, mental, and emotional well-being. This monthly column provides tips for anyone who is helping raise children, based on the world-renowned Triple P – Positive Parenting Program, available to families in Santa Cruz County. If you have a question or idea for a future column, email me at triplep@first5scc.org. Dear Nicole,I don’t have a question but would appreciate any tips or supportive words. I’m exhausted and running on empty. Dealing with the pandemic and mental and behavioral challenges at home and work has burned me out. I’m losing my patience with my toddler and tween-ager even more than usual and then end up feeling terrible. I feel alone and overwhelmed. I’m not the only one, right? -Carly Dear Carly,You’re definitely not the only one! It takes enormous physical, mental, and emotional energy to be a positive parent. It’s hard to find that energy on a “regular” day, and it’s been very challenging for many parents and caregivers who have dealt with one emergency after another the last few years. It’s natural and common to feel exhausted and overwhelmed, and you are not alone. Here are some tips and supportive words for you (and others who feel the same way): Prioritize self-care. This is crucial, especially when you’re feeling burned out and overwhelmed. Taking care of yourself will help you renew and sustain the energy needed to be present and patient with your family. Take time every day to do something you enjoy and that makes you feel content, whether it’s reading a book, cooking, working on a hobby, going for a walk in nature, or something else. Self-care also includes eating healthy foods, getting enough sleep, and exercising regularly. Practice mindfulness. This is a powerful tool for managing stress and reducing feelings of being overwhelmed. It’s about being present in the moment and accepting your thoughts and feelings without judgment. When you feel stressed, try taking a few deep breaths, focusing on the sensations in your body, or doing a short meditation. Mindfulness can help you stay calm and centered during challenging situations. Strengthen your support system. It’s vital to have people you can turn to when you need help or guidance (and we all could use help and guidance at some point) – whether it’s related to parenting, your own mental well-being, other family relationships, financial needs, child care, school, health care, or other issues. Asking for and accepting help and support from family members, friends, and other people you trust in your personal and work life can help you avoid burnout and reduce stress. If you want to talk with people who aren’t involved in your daily life (i.e., the ones contributing to your stress), consider participating in parenting classes or joining an online parenting community to connect with other parents, get support, and share experiences. This can help you feel less alone and provide you with valuable insights and skills. Take breaks. This is an essential aspect of self-care. Every parent needs time to “recharge their battery” so they have the energy to be a positive, nurturing caregiver. This could mean asking someone to watch your kids so you can take a break from being a parent and spend some time alone. It could also mean taking a break from the hectic pace of daily life and saying “no” to additional activities and commitments that add stress instead of relieving stress. FINAL THOUGHTS: Parenting can be challenging, especially during difficult times. It’s natural to feel exhausted and overwhelmed. Remember that you’re not alone, and it’s okay to prioritize taking care of your own needs so that you can be a positive, nurturing parent for your children. Nicole Young is the mother of two children, ages 19 and 23, who also manages Santa Cruz County’s Triple P – Positive Parenting Program, the world’s leading positive parenting program. Scientifically proven, Triple P is made available locally by First 5 Santa Cruz County, the Santa Cruz County Health Services Agency (Mental Health Services Act) and the Santa Cruz County Human Services Department. To find a Triple P parenting class or practitioner, visit http://triplep.first5scc.org, http://www.facebook.com/triplepscc or contact First 5 Santa Cruz County at 465-2217 or triplep@first5scc.org.

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Coloring Contest

growingupsc — Fri, 05 May 2023 00:40:00 +0000

Coloring Contest Winners

growingupsc — Fri, 05 May 2023 00:31:27 +0000